I was reading an essay by Theodore Dalrymple, a thoughtful writer of conservative persuasion, who casually remarked in an aside that once you've participated in one orgy you've participated in them all. That implied that Mr. Moral Rectitude had not only attended one orgy, but several. That brought me up short and started me reconsidering my attitude to Teddy boy. But then, I reflected, he's just a guy after all, so what do you expect? *Shrug*
Then I thought what if Heather Mac Donald, also a thoughtful writer of conservative persuasion, had casually remarked in one of her essays that she had participated in orgies and was rather jaded about group sex. I expect that would be the last time she would ever write for any conservative publication.
Shooing my mind away from imagining Theodore and Heather in sexual congress amidst a pile of writhing bodies, I reflected on the way men always boast about how many sexual partners they've had and what sexual adventures they've experienced, yet condemn any woman they suspect of having had more than one sexual partner as a slut.
That frosts my cookies, as grandma used to say, because where do they think they get all those girls they proudly claim they've totally wrecked?
But then, thinking further, I realized that the most harsh criticism of me personally for things I have done -- or they thought I had done -- has come from women, and that criticism has been viciously personal and intended to do me emotional harm. I even once casually mentioned that in a brief stint as a waitress when I was in college that I enjoyed flirting with male customers and that doing so earned me nice tips. A woman who heard me said that she, too, had once been a waitress but she didn't have to demean herself to get good tips. See, I was demeaning myself by having fun with some guys on their lunch break. Thus, she established her moral superiority to me, little hussy that I was.
She couldn't grasp -- didn't want to grasp -- that I just liked my customers and enjoyed bantering with them. The good tips were merely lagniappe, not the reason I flirted. I like making people feel good and enjoy themselves. Much of daily life is a boring grind, sometimes stressful and often disappointing. So why not spend a few minutes putting a bit of fun into someone's life?
Phooey.
Anyway, I do suspect that, aside from patrons of professionals, the average male actually has fewer sexual partners than a reasonably attractive female. I have gotten hit on more times than I can count over the years, but never once have I hit on a man. It wouldn't even occur to me to do so. I've flirted, even teased, sure, but the interaction was always initiated in some way by the man, not by me. It's fun, but it's not serious; at least not in my case and I think the guys have understood it's just banter.
But had I been so inclined, I could have had sex with every man who ever hit on me. Could a man say the same thing about every woman he's hit on? I don't think so.
